What does success feel like when it’s truly mine?

The True Feeling of Success: How to Define and Embrace Your Own Version of Fulfillment

Success isn’t one-size-fits-all. Learn how to recognize and create the kind of success that feels authentic to you.


Introduction

We’re often taught to measure success by external milestones—money, titles, or accolades. But true success isn’t about meeting someone else’s expectations; it’s about creating a life and business that feel deeply aligned with who you are.

Success feels truly yours when it resonates with your inner values, aligns with your priorities, and brings you genuine fulfillment. Imagine wearing a custom-tailored suit—it fits perfectly, reflecting your unique personality, style, and needs. That’s the essence of defining success on your own terms. It’s not about ticking boxes on someone else’s checklist but crafting a journey and destination that feel rewarding and meaningful to you.

Have you ever wondered what success would feel like if it was truly yours? Let’s explore how to define your unique vision of success and how to embrace it fully.


Why This Matters

"It’s like wearing a custom-tailored suit—true success fits you perfectly, while someone else’s version feels awkward and forced."

Many entrepreneurs struggle with:

  • Comparing their success to others.
  • Chasing goals that don’t truly resonate.
  • Feeling unfulfilled even after achieving “traditional” success.

Defining success on your own terms allows you to build a life and business that feel purposeful, joyful, and authentic.


The Main Question

"What does success look and feel like for you?"

True success:

  • Reflects your values and priorities.
  • Brings a sense of fulfillment, not just achievement.
  • Aligns with your unique strengths and goals.

How to Define and Embrace Your Own Success

A Story of Transformation

Andrea Smith, a former corporate executive, built her own consulting business and quickly hit six figures. On paper, she was successful, but something felt off. She realized she had been chasing the same metrics of success she had in her corporate life, rather than creating a vision that aligned with her personal goals.

Here’s how Andrea redefined success:

  • Clarified Her Values: She realized freedom and time with family were more important than a higher income.
  • Redesigned Her Business Model: Andrea shifted to working fewer hours with premium clients who valued her expertise.
  • Focused on Fulfillment: She stopped comparing herself to others and celebrated the balance she created in her life.

Andrea now feels successful—not because of her income alone, but because her business supports the life she truly wants.


Steps to Define and Embrace Your Own Version of Success

1. Identify Your Core Values

Your values are the foundation of authentic success. Without clarity on what truly matters to you, it’s easy to chase goals that don’t fulfill you.

  • Example: If creativity is a core value, prioritize projects or roles that allow you to innovate and express yourself.
  • Pro Tip: Use a value assessment tool, such as the Personal Values Questionnaire, to uncover and rank your top priorities.

Ask yourself:

  • What moments in my life made me feel most alive?
  • Which activities make me lose track of time?

2. Envision Your Ideal Day

Creating a vision of success begins with imagining what a fulfilling day looks like for you. Think about:

  • Time Allocation: How much time do you want to dedicate to work, hobbies, and family?

  • Activities: What specific tasks or interactions energize you?

  • Environment: Where are you working or living, and who surrounds you?

  • Example: For someone prioritizing flexibility, a successful day might involve working from a serene home office in the morning and spending afternoons with loved ones.

3. Align Your Goals With Your Vision

It’s vital to align your goals with your personal values and envisioned lifestyle.

  • Example: Instead of a vague goal like "make more money," set specific objectives like "earn $10,000 per month while working 30-hour weeks."
  • Pro Tip: Use SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound) goals to ensure your objectives are actionable and aligned.

4. Celebrate Small Wins

Big milestones matter, but so do the smaller achievements along the way. Recognizing these wins keeps you motivated and aligned.

  • Example: Celebrate signing your first premium client by treating yourself to a dinner with friends.
  • Quote: "Happiness is not in the mere possession of money; it lies in the joy of achievement, in the thrill of creative effort." — Franklin D. Roosevelt

5. Let Go of Comparison

Comparing your journey to others’ can lead to self-doubt and dissatisfaction. Instead, focus on your unique progress and values.

  • Example: If a peer achieves a milestone you admire, use it as inspiration rather than a measure of your self-worth.
  • Pro Tip: Limit time on social media platforms that encourage comparison. Reflect daily on your own achievements and priorities.


Emotional Resonance

Success isn’t just about achieving—it’s about feeling aligned, fulfilled, and proud of the life you’ve built.

When success feels truly yours, it brings a sense of peace and purpose that no external validation can replace.

Imagine waking up each day feeling energized, balanced, and deeply connected to your goals. That’s what success feels like when it’s authentically yours.


Frequently Asked Questions

1. How do I identify my core values?

Start by reflecting on moments when you felt happiest or most fulfilled. Identify the underlying values in those experiences, such as freedom, creativity, or connection.

  • Example: If you felt most fulfilled volunteering at a local shelter, compassion and contribution might be core values.
  • Pro Tip: Keep a journal of meaningful moments over the next month to see patterns in what truly fulfills you.

2. What if my goals conflict with my values?

Reevaluate your goals and adjust them to align with your values. Misaligned goals lead to burnout and dissatisfaction.

  • Example: If financial goals conflict with family time, consider creating a flexible work schedule or outsourcing tasks to create balance.
  • Quote: "Your goals should align with your priorities—not compete with them." — Stephen Covey

3. How do I handle setbacks while pursuing my vision of success?

View setbacks as learning opportunities. Adjust your approach and remind yourself that progress, not perfection, is key.

  • Example: If a business venture fails, analyze what went wrong and use those lessons to refine your next strategy.
  • Pro Tip: Surround yourself with a supportive network that reminds you of your long-term vision.

4. Can I redefine success later in life?

Absolutely. Success evolves as your priorities and circumstances change. Regularly reassess your vision to ensure it remains aligned with your values.

  • Example: A successful corporate executive might redefine success as transitioning to a fulfilling mentorship role later in their career.
  • Quote: "Success is not a destination, but the road you’re on." — Mariska Hargitay

5. How can I avoid comparing myself to others?

Focus on your journey and celebrate your progress. Limit exposure to social media or environments that trigger comparison.

  • Example: Replace mindless scrolling with activities that align with your values, like reading or exercising.
  • Pro Tip: Practice gratitude daily to remind yourself of your unique blessings and achievements.

Visualizing Your Journey

Below is an infographic to help you visualize the process of defining and embracing your unique version of success:

Infographic: Defining and Embracing Success


External Resources to Deepen Your Understanding

  1. Psychology Today: Finding Your Personal Values – A guide to discovering what truly matters to you.
  2. Harvard Business Review: How to Set Meaningful Goals – Expert insights on aligning goals with your personal vision.
  3. Forbes: Achieving Work-Life Balance – Strategies for creating a fulfilling life and career.
  4. TED Talk: The Power of Vulnerability by Brené Brown – Explore how vulnerability can lead to a more authentic and fulfilling life.

Conclusion

Success is deeply personal. By identifying your core values, envisioning your ideal day, and aligning your goals, you can create a version of success that feels uniquely yours. Remember, the journey matters as much as the destination. Celebrate your progress, stay true to your vision, and embrace the fulfillment that comes with living authentically.

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About the Author

Juan Carlos Arzola, CHPC, is a faith-driven visionary, proud Peruvian, and devoted single father of two incredible sons, living and thriving in Miami. As a Certified High-Performance Coach to the world’s most ambitious achievers—leaders pursuing transformative dreams such as Nobel Prizes, United Nations initiatives, and NASA-level innovations—Arzola is deeply committed to empowering others to lead lives of significance.

Arzola is the founder and CEO of Ask.me, a revolutionary platform designed to help professionals successfully transition into entrepreneurship. His own inspiring journey from employee to thriving entrepreneur reflects his unwavering belief in transformation through faith, purpose, and strategic leadership.

A best-selling author, Arzola wrote The Success Start: Proven Practices to Build a Life of Significance, a guide that has empowered countless readers to define and achieve their personal and professional goals. The book is available on Amazon and at the prestigious Harvard Book Store. As a co-author of The Big Question with broadcasting legend Larry King, he shares profound insights on life, leadership, and legacy. Learn more about his collaboration with Larry King here.

A sought-after speaker and podcast guest, Arzola has shared his expertise on renowned platforms including The Culture Matters Podcast, Grown Folks Talking Live, and The Dreamcast Podcast. With a focus on personal growth, high performance, and creating meaningful impact, he equips high achievers with actionable strategies and inspiring insights to refine their visions and achieve measurable success.

Arzola’s work blends practical wisdom with a deep sense of purpose, helping individuals unlock their full potential and leave lasting legacies. Learn more about his mission to transform lives and inspire change at Ask.me.

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